Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Breaking Through



Many people have trouble with trustwhether it be because they trust too easily or because they have difficulty trusting. It's hard knowing, knowing who to trust, and with what. Sometimes we trust different friends with different aspects of our lives. A friend for boy stories, a friend for family problems, a friend for those embarrassing blonde moments. Isn't it interesting to reflect on who we choose to provide with what information? Trust is about several things. It's about who will keep your tales to themselves. Who will best provide advice and comfort. Who will not judge you. Who could best relate. And sometimes simply who you spend the majority of your time with.

Within the past few days, I've gotten a new perspective on trust. Trust isn't just about who you decide to share your life with, it's more so about who we choose to share our imperfections with. Which is why trust is such a big deal to all of us. Naturally, we want to come off as great, flawless people. We ourselves know this isn't the case, especially since we're so criticizing of ourselves. However, we like to let others believe we are. The more others believe we're flawless, the more confident we feel about ourselves. Thus, letting imperfections break through our shields isn't at the top of our to-do lists. But sometimes, sometimes we can't help but want to seek help. Can't help but want to share our problems. And that's when we're left with the decision of who to trust. Who to let into our inner bubble.

I used to be a person who trusted too easily. Once I felt comfortable, I wasn't the least bit hesitant to share. Recently however, I've learned this shouldn't be the case. It's important to filter and distinguish between those who are close to you and those who aren't. Yet at the same time, just because someone is close to you doesn't mean you're obligated to inform them of all your delights and woes. Likewise, just because you spend a lot of time with someone doesn't mean you have to give him or her a full view of your life. Some relationships are more so based on having fun and spending time together rather than getting personal. From these relationships, I've had to forcefully adjust trust. I've learned it's best to be there for the other person, but to be careful what I share, because there's a difference between who genuinely care and who are simply curious.

Naturally, as you lose touch with some friends and get close to others, the degree of trust you instill in different people will also shift. But it seems that those who you trust most always find a way back into your life. Along with an abundance of trust comes a bit of an attachment, a bond. And these important ones, you'll find them making their ways back into your life. And those that keep coming back, those that care to work for your trust, those that have been there for you over an extended period of time you know they not only have, but will also take care of, the true trust you leave in their hands.